I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
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And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
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is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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