i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
