And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
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