eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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