At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...