i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
