I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize
