I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Can I color on your dick again?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
