I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
