there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.