So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
