Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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