I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize