Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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