he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
