I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
