he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
