names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
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