my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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