we have pet lesbian snakes
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
