look no pants
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
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