I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
