I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
