Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
