I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
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you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS