Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
