she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I showed him my bush... on skype.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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