ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
These 25 Soulless Industries Have Been Scamming Us For Years
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
These 21 People Got Piercings And It Improved Their Sex Life
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.