I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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