Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Best friends brother. Beat that.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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