you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
