you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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