ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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