my being single is dangerous.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
