btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
