we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize