Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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