she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I am available for nakedness
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
