Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Are you drinking alone?

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  no, i'm watching house

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  That doesn't count.

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  wtf, then i'm always alone

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  (601): Are you drinking alone? (662): no, i'm watching house (601): That doesn't count. (662): wtf, then i'm always alone http://tfl.nu/bvid
  Replies (18) Good night (886) Bad night (1235)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.

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  (281): Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location. http://tfl.nu/j750
  Replies (30) Good night (4519) Bad night (668)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.

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  (562): Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont. http://tfl.nu/ey1g
  Replies (14) Good night (814) Bad night (3418)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability

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  (917): we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability http://tfl.nu/xeg6
  Replies (1) Good night (2217) Bad night (799)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.

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  (504): Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed. http://tfl.nu/fl8o
  Replies (12) Good night (4495) Bad night (898)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.

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  (785): You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina. http://tfl.nu/6dr6
  Replies (8) Good night (3111) Bad night (901)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?

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  (781): What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body? http://tfl.nu/d4hy
  Replies (11) Good night (1574) Bad night (551)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.

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  (314): Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there. http://tfl.nu/fiix
  Replies (6) Good night (1261) Bad night (1294)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often

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  (301): Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often http://tfl.nu/2a6o
  Replies (8) Good night (1715) Bad night (525)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.

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  (540): For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners. http://tfl.nu/0hks
  Replies (4) Good night (1659) Bad night (589)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Come down off the roof.

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  (847): Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go. (314): Come down off the roof. http://tfl.nu/d3mp
  Replies (3) Good night (1994) Bad night (672)
• Favorite

  (213): View more from California

  hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"

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  (213): hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month" http://tfl.nu/hs5s
  Replies (17) Good night (1064) Bad night (968)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls

  (1-908): View more from New Jersey

  But you'll make an exception

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  probably not

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  (908): I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls (1-908): But you'll make an exception (908): probably not http://tfl.nu/9drh
  Replies (6) Good night (1582) Bad night (565)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?

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  (425): OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES? http://tfl.nu/syph
  Replies (18) Good night (2146) Bad night (506)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...

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  (360): Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys... http://tfl.nu/6y99
  Replies (3) Good night (649) Bad night (401)

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