Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
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Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
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Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
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