so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Randomize
