I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
