I got chris browned last night
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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