i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
