We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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