there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
