She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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