He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
