I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
