We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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